Life is What You Make it.

I had an amazing weekend. I spent most of Saturday doing a walking tour of the ancient city of Pompeii, once a great Roman colony then destroyed by the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius (so named because they were unaware that it was a volcano) now a well preserved and fascinating time capsule. I was on a student trip offered through my study abroad program, and was lucky enough to meet quite a few amazing people. We then spent the night in a hotel in Sorrento and visited a fresh limoncello factory. Bright and early Sunday morning we took a ferry to the small beautiful island of Capri and spent the day swimming and exploring in the sun. Late that night we finally arrived home. Unfortunately during the course of the trip I lost my camera. I foolishly left it in the hotel room in Sorrento and when I called the hotel they said it was nowhere to be found. I woke up the next morning exhausted from the weekend's adventures, not having had much sleep. I went to my morning class and found it hard to concentrate as I felt a headache coming on, the kind you know will last all day.
Upset about my camera, frustrated by my aching head and still exhausted instead of sitting out in the sun to do my homework like I normally would I decided to take a nap before my next class. I don't like to waste time being so lazy when living in such an amazing city, but it was just shaping up to be one of those days. I awoke a couple hours later, expecting to feel refreshed, renewed and rejuvenated, but that proved to be high expectations because I felt the same, if not worse than before. Somehow in the period of my nap my mild headache had turned into a slight fever and a runny nose as well. I hate being sick, it happens to me quite a lot as my immune system was over worked when I was a child and I suppose it is just lazy now. I'm traveling again on Thursday and the last thing I wanted was to get sick a couple days before! I tried to deny it, telling myself that if I thought healthy thoughts I would feel healthy (I am a firm believer in mind over matter). Some things, however, are just not feasible.

It was around this time that I was flipping through a little notebook I keep with me that has everything from my grocery lists to my thoughts to my drafts for what I am going to post on this blog. I found a short entry that read simply 'Life is what you make it.' I remember writing that, I remember having listened to a girl on the trip with me talking at dinner in Sorrento about how much she disliked Florence and how she just wanted to go home to her boyfriend and I thought to myself Life is what you make it.
If I sit inside all day wallowing in self pity for having lost my camera and for being sick I will feel pitiful. If I go out to dinner with a friend instead, share a scrumptious pizza and a bottle of wine and walk home under the stars I may not be miraculously healthy all of a sudden but I will be a hell of a lot happier than sitting at home. If you expect life to be great you have to make it great, otherwise your expectations will not be met. I've been sitting at my computer for three days now trying to string together a positive blog post to share with the internet world and failing because I was not feeling very positive. I was waiting for the words to come to me but in truth I had to go out and find them. I forced myself to go outside to do my homework today, I still felt sick, I was still tired, and I was feeling lazy and bored but I put my mythology book into my bag and pushed myself out the door. I didn't end up going my homework, I didn't even end up sitting down. Instead I walked around this city that I call home, weaving in and out of tourists, bypassing a leather market and yes, I may have gone window shopping and yes that window shopping may have turned into actually purchasing two things (it's not retail therapy unless you actually buy something!) and yes I probably should have sat in the sun and done my homework instead. But at least I didn't sit inside and feel sorry for myself.
I'm still sick, but I feel better. Mind over matter. Thinking healthy may not make me healthy, but thinking happy makes me happy.